Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Where is God......

I am sorry again that it has been such a long time since I posted. I am writing this now as a person who has finished my first year of seminary. It is so hard to imagine how fast this went by!! It was a time of great transition both good and bad. I struggled in many arenas but I also excelled in many other arenas as well.

I am leaving tomorrow afternoon back to Minnesota to continue my journey. I have a few days off, heading up to Duluth for a few days before I get back to start my Clinical Pastoral Education in St. Paul. I am so excited but a little nervous for this chaplaincy but I am ready and willing to head out.

I titled this post where is God because lately that is how I am thinking about things in my life. I have had experiences and I start to ask myself where is God in this? Many times I am surprised that I had blocked God out of the situation and it became all about me (insert chuckle). I have learned that this is not all about me and that there are times where I have to let God be God, no matter how difficult it can be. As I started down the last few days of the semester I found that I was extremely overwhelmed and I was getting irritable and anxious. I sat down and asked myself where is God? I realized that I had not been praying like I should be and that I was not giving my anxiety over to God. I decided to sit and do Evening Prayer in my room and give my stress and my anxiety over to God. Now this is not to assume that God was coming down and writing my papers but rather I asked for help. I asked God to walk with me and be with me and to help me deal with this yucky feeling.

I am also a little sad to see the graduates leave. I have been so fortunate to build wonderful relationships this year and I know when I get back a large group of people I have come to know and love will not be here. I find great joy however in knowing that these people will be my peers throughout my career and I can turn to them in times of need or support. This is a really interesting part of seminary that we build such intense relationships and then we seem to disappear. We do not disappear but rather we leave here ready to hit the ground running in our various ministries. Again I ask, Where is God? I see God in this arena as giving us a great network of friends and peers that will be able to support us no matter where we are in the country. This group of people will be there and able to help me see things in my ministries in very different contexts.

So to all of you who have prayed and loved me through this year I give you my heartfelt thanks. I would not be able to accomplish this without the love and support of my partner Matthew, my children (Princess Patty, Princess Lucy, Nadia, and Julia) my family in Minnesota and Arizona and without the love and support of my friends and prayer partners. Please know that I keep you in my prayers!

I hope to keep blogging through the summer.

I love you all and thank you!


Jason Lucas