Monday, March 4, 2013

The Sacredness of Hands

Hello all!

Long time no update, my apologies.  I am writing this post as I am in the middle of my last semester of seminary.  It is really hard to imagine that it is the last semester, it seems like just yesterday I started this blog to fill you all in on my new adventure in seminary.

Well lets see alot has happened since I last did an update.  I survived the General Ordination Exams and have it the ground running this semester.  I will admit that the semester has come with many challenges personally that have honestly hit me like a truck some days.  However, recently I have been amazed to see how much God is calling me to this ministry.  Despite the challenges that are coming I am finding ways that have been showing me ministry in action.  I spent a few days in February cooking at the Winterfaith shelter in San Francisco.  I was apart of a team that prepared and served meals to about 70 homeless men.  After I was done with my cooking part I decided that I wanted to sit with the men rather than doing the serving.  I had some wonderful and amazing conversations!  One of the days we had way more volunteers in the kitchen than what was needed so I sat at the entrance withe the check in crew and watched as these men came in.  I noticed their hands the most; they were dirty, cracked, and tired.  As I was watching these men sign in I was over come with emotion and with the Holy Spirit.  Hands are something that is important to all of us; we are called to be the hands of God in the world and to do this we come across hands just like these men had who are in need of rest, care and love.  As the week progressed, the guys and I had formed a relationship that was joking at time, serious at time, but at all time with mutual love and respect.  I asked one of the guys how his life was and how people saw him.  He told me that many times people do not even see him it is as if he is invisible.  However, he loved coming to the shelter because at the shelter people knew him talked to him and cared about him. I will tell you that I was taken aback by this.  I know that it is often the easy thing to do to just walk on by a homeless person but we need to remember that the homeless are children of God as well.  Something as simple as saying Good morning or hello can let them feel alive.  As I said good bye to the guys I had formed a bond with one of them came up and gave me a big hug and just said thank you.  I could see how the Holy Spirit had been working to remind me why I am being called to this ministry.

It is so amazing to me to see how God in subtle and sometimes not so subtle ways reminds us of our calling.  We are all busy and at times get bombarded by the insane amount of work and commitments that we have that we sometimes loose track of our calling.  But in this past couple of weeks I have been absolutely amazed to see how God is reminding me; and all of them were when I was using my hands. 



So I wonder now how we can look to see how our hands are being used in the world. Are they being used to care, love and support our neighbors and communities?  Or are our hands in need of care, love and support? 

I look back and start to think of the many hands who have helped me during this time of seminary and I amazed.  Some where in forms of writing a check to help me pay for books, or helping me edit one of my papers, or holding my hand when things were tough or in prayer for me. 

This evening I had an amazing honor of laying my hands in prayer on one of my fellow students.  There have been so many times when I have gone to her to ask for prayer and it was amazing and honoring to be able to give her that gift back as well as receiving the gift from her.  

I challenge all of us to take a good look on our hands and to see how we can take our hands and put them to work in the world.

As always you are all in my payers.

Peace
Jason B. Lucas

Sunday, December 16, 2012

December 16, 2012 Sermon--St. Luke's Episcopal Church Minneapolis, MN

This is the sermon I preached at my home parish in response to the shooting that occurred in Connecticut.  

***********************************************************************

“Surely it is God who saves me; I will trust in him and not be afraid. For the Lord is my strong hold and my sure defense and he will be my Savior.”

I had just got off the plane in Minneapolis on Friday and as soon as I got home Matthew and I turned on the television and watch with great shock at the shootings that were occurring in Connecticut.  As I was watching my mind went to the words of our Gospel today, “YOU BROOD OF VIPERS!”  Only a viper would do something like this to innocent children who were in school, a place where they should feel safe!  I could not keep my eyes away from the TV I called Katherine and we talked about this sermon and how it should be approached.  We talked about different ways of responding to the events.

The initial reaction hearing the news was that only a terrible person, a viper, would do something like this.  I wanted answers; I wanted to know why this happened why did God allow this to occur to innocent people?  In times such as these there are so many questions, so much confusion, so much pain and hurt.  To be honest, I do not have the answers to these questions but we search for meaning and answers.  It is in times such as these that we turn to each other and to God seeing for solace and comfort. I watched and saw how there were people all round the school hugging crying and being there for each other in that time.  Many of these people knew each other while others did not but it did not matter in this moment their were all the same a community of people hurting and deeply wounded.  We also turn to scripture looking for guidance.   I watched with amazement as President Obama teared up as he was speaking about the events that occurred Friday Morning.  The most interesting part that struck me was how he ended his speech with words of scripture he stated, “May God bless the memory of the victims and, in the words of scripture, heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds.” I also turn to our readings today, Canticle 9 is one that has always been one of my favorites the opening, “Surely it is God who saves me; I will trust in him and not be afraid. For the Lord is my strong hold and my sure defense and he will be my Savior.”

I think that in many times we look to God and ask the same question that crowds asked John in the Gospel today, “What then shall we do?”  John responds, “Whoever has two coats must share with anyone who has none; and whoever has food must do likewise.”  We need to turn to each other and give a hand of peace and reconciliation to each other.  Not just in times such as Friday but every day of our lives.  We need to build a community where we no longer look at how we are different and focusing on ensuring that we are keeping the walls up between each other but rather we need to open the doors of welcome and consolation.  Our church is a church where we are all welcome and one that gives us safely in God’s love and hope but also one where everyone is a child of God no matter who they are.

But there is one more person that some might be forgetting and that is the one who shot all of those people.  This man also is a Child of God and even though it is hard for us to see God working in his life because of his actions he is no less a child of God.  There might have been mental illness or something else that lead to these actions but that is not for us to decide but we should still be praying for this man as well as his family.  Praying for someone who hurts us is a very difficult task to take on but it is one that Jesus himself spoke about, Matthew 18:21-22 tells us, “Then Peter came and said to him, ‘Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times.”[1]  Despite the terror, fear and pain, he created we need to try to forgive him.  This is something that will not happen over night but over time.  This is when we rely on our faith in God and our community help us work on being able to give someone forgiveness when they have hurt us.  I pray that God will give us the grace to be able to heal and to forgive.

 “Surely it is God who saves me; I will trust in him and not be afraid. For the Lord is my strong hold and my sure defense and he will be my Savior.”

I was reading Facebook last night and I was reading all the responses that were coming across there were people who are all across the political and social lines saying the same thing: “we are scared, we are hurt, we need to pray.”  The questions that I brought up earlier as well as the many questions that are coming up surrounding the events that happened on Friday morning are questions that we do not have the answers for and there are times where the answers can only come from God alone.  So how do we live in the tension of knowing that there are some answers that God can only answer and it is these questions that we might not get for a long time?  This is where our faith comes in; it is a tension where we continue to pray and to study the scriptures and serve one another.  We live in the moments of hope, prayer and service and this is how we live in to this tension. This tension is not a very easy thing to live but our hope in is God and in each other to help us through this tension.

“Surely it is God who saves me; I will trust in him and not be afraid. For the Lord is my strong hold and my sure defense and he will be my Savior.”

In this time of Advent when we are preparing our hearts to share in the celebration of the Birth of Jesus; we must remember what Jesus gave to us and that is the hope of the resurrection where we will be united with all the saints in the heavenly banquet.

May we spend these next two weeks of Advent in prayer and reflection on those questions that can only be answered by God and come together in prayer in community to help us on the journey of life.  Unfortunately, events such as the events in Connecticut will happen again but if we work to be with each other and serve each other and to stand up for change then we can cause great change in the world.  Many people say to themselves well I am just one person what difference can I make?  Well think about the apostles Jesus picked twelve apostles and their work and ministry has brought the Good New of Christ to all corners of the Earth.

These events have given me a fire in my belly to go out and work for change.  I invite you to join me in helping to create a world where all people are safe, where we can go to work or school and know we are safe, where poverty and injustices are worked in and to see Christ in all people where no matter who we are and what we are the core relationship we have with each other is being children of God.

“Surely it is God who saves me; I will trust in him and not be afraid. For the Lord is my strong hold and my sure defense and he will be my Savior.”

[1] Matthew 18:21-22

Monday, October 8, 2012

Hello from the land of Sunshine!

It is hard to imagine that I am quickly coming up on reading week, which is the 1/2 point of the semester.  Soon my thoughts will quickly turn towards finals and another semester will be done.  It is hard to imagine that this journey is quickly coming to an end, when I first started I thought that seminary would never end but the days keep going quicker and quicker!  I think that the main reason is that I am now doing things and putting the book learning to action.  I have been working as a Deacon at Church of our Saviour in Mill Valley, this is the same parish where I had been the seminarian last year and I was offered and I accepted the ability to work there during my Transitional Diaconate year.  I have been serving in the liturgy, going on pastoral care visits, and leading the stewardship campaign this year. 

In September I was approached and told that there was someone who found out that her brother was killed in Guatemala, she was crushed that she would not be able to go to the funeral.  As I was talking to her the spirit spoke and we decided to hold a memorial service  for her brother.  I was asked to lead it and to continue the pastoral care for her and her family.  I was amazed to see how beautiful the experience was!  To walk with someone on there journey is where God is calling me to be and this situation helped confirm it.  I was also able to practice my Spanish, being a native speaker I had thought I had lost alot of my Spanish since moving to Minnesota but I was amazed how much I remembered and it was old hat for me!

I am currently taking Christian Ethics, Exegesis of Luke for Preaching, a Special Reading Course (independent study) on Latin American Anglicanism, and Senior Liturgical studies. The classes are alot of work and reading but it is so worth it.

Prayers and blessings to you all!

The Rev. Jason Lucas

Thursday, September 20, 2012

The audio portion of my senior sermon

Hi everyone, just a quick link to the audio from my senior sermon.  Hope you like it!

http://cdsp.edu/community/worship/senior-sermons

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Hello there!!! It is me I am here! and Text from my senior sermon

Hi everyone, I am sorry for the late very late update; I am back in California after a very full summer. I returned back to Minnesota in May and spent some wonderful time with Matthew and the pugs, as well as seeing many of you. While I was in Minnesota I was also ordained to the diaconate. It was an absolutely wonderful service and I am so thankful to all of you for your prayers love and support!

 A picture with The Rev. Alan Grant one of my favorite mentors

I quickly then returned back to California to be a Teaching Assistant for two classes during our Anglican Immersion summer school.  It was an amazing experience to be able to be on the other side of the classroom as well as being able to help plan liturgies and work as the sacristan for the classes.  It was two weeks of very long days but it was a wonderful experience. 

I have been working as a deacon in a few different communities and it has been so much fun.  I am now back in classes and it is time to switch back to the "student mode".  

Today I gave my senior sermon at CDSP, I was very apprehensive to be preaching not only my senior sermon infront of my peers and my professors but there was the element of September 11.  Below is the text of my sermon.  I will try to get more postings out there to let you know what I am doing.

Thank you all so much for your love and support!  

Peace,
The Rev. Jason Lucas



Senior Sermon--The Rev. Jason Bryan Lucas
Church Divinity School of the Pacific September 11, 2012
All Saint’s Chapel
Genesis 8:12-17, 20-22; Hebrews 4:12-16; Luke 23:32-43
___________________________________________________

I was asleep and heard a pounding at my door; it was my friend from down the hall yelling at me that we were “under attack!” I went and answered the door and had no idea what was happening. We ran down to the TV lounge and watched the news we watched in awe as we saw billows of smoke coming out of one of the Twin Towers. I sat and watched in terror, I saw people who were bloody, covered in dust, panicked, confused and terrified. I sat and did not leave watching the news for over 6 hours; I kept asking myself who would do this to us? My friend who was sitting with me kept saying “we need to get them back this is not going to stand we will get them back!”



Watching and listening to the events that occurred on September 11th I realized that our country and world had changed, we could never go back to the way things where. We saw many in this country coming together to pray, to console each other; to stand as Americans TOGETHER! But following the event the divisions started to occur, our united country started to divide, as there were discussions about if we should go to war, what should be the response from the United States. We have seen these divisions being played out in our country and even our world in many ways.



We are here to remember the lives of those who died in the September 11th tragedy but it is just more than remembering the lives but it is looking at the world in a different light. We live in a world we self-identify as progressives, traditionalist, liberals, conservatives, Roman Catholic, Episcopalian, Jewish, Muslim; we use these identities to show the world who we are and we surround ourselves with like minded people, because it is safe and comfortable. No matter how comfortable we feel these labels put us into silos. From within our own silos we are able to observe that the other silos contain people that are different than us; we disagree with their ideologies, their way of thinking, how they pray, among other things. Soon we begin to step back from them further and further until our disagreements turn ugly. We are seeing these divisions playing out in very difficult and sometimes terrifying way. We are see mudslinging in elections, wanting to exclude others from being part of community with us, no longer wanting to break bread, to stand up and walk away from the table rather than have a conversation and dialogue. Turn on the news and watch the current political debate we are inundated with hearing how one party is right and how the other is wrong, how if you vote this way every will be ok; see how there was so much tension in our own Church during General Convention. We are spending time focusing on how we are different than the “other” group of people and how they are wrong with us. But I think it is time for a new way; what we are experiencing in the world is not working. I am not sure about you but I am praying for a change. That is why when I was working with the group planning this liturgy it was suggested that we look at the proper’s for Reconciliation and Forgiveness. These are two concepts that we talk a lot about in the church and in our lives but they are very difficult ones to put into practice.



As humans when someone hurts us it is very easy to stay angry with the person that hurt us and to put them in a silo that we will not engage with; we are quick to say, “I don’t want to deal with that person because they hurt me.” It is easier to stay away then tell the person directly how their actions affected us. I dream of a world where instead of quickly writing someone or a group of people off for hurting us we first looked at them as Children of God. In this world, we would look at each other as being a gift from God even if they are, Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Roman Catholic, Episcopalian, or anything else that is different to who we are. It is not until we can see each other as children of God that reconciliation can be accomplished. So how can we make this dream a reality? Recently, I was sitting with a fellow student talking about this and that when she shared a meditation that she uses in her life. It is a meditation called Ho'oponopono. Maybe you are familiar with it. It has been sitting in the back of my mind as I left her room. The mediation is, “I am sorry, please forgive me, I love you, thank you.”[1] This simple meditation brings with it a very powerful message; the words contained in this mediation are some of the most difficult words that we can ever say; to admit to another person that we have hurt them; then to ask for forgiveness. To see them as a child of God and to share with them that we Love them for who they are and finally to thank them not only helps to bring true reconciliation but opens up a dialogue between people that have shared great division.



In the Gospel today we hear of the criminals that were crucified with Jesus; one of them is asking Jesus to save them from what is happening while the other one turns and says, “and we indeed have been condemned justly.”[2] The criminal in his own way is offering an apology and acknowledgement of the wrongs he had done. He asks Jesus to remember him when he comes into his Kingdom. Jesus’ response to the second criminal is one that showed that he had made his reconciliation with God and with Jesus.



Let us remember the words of the opening collect, “give us the grace to make peace with those from whom we are divided, that, forgiven and forgiving, we may ever be one in Christ.”[3] This collect reminds us that in order to work on reconciliation with each other we need to ask for the grace to enter into it.



We as Christians talk about being the body of Christ, but the silos and divisions that we live in are breaking apart the body of Christ. Disagreement within the Body of Christ will occur but at the end of the day we need to know that we need the people on the other side of the table. Even if we disagree with them they are apart of the same body of Christ that we are. A body that is divided is one that can not live.



For many in this chapel today, we are preparing to enter into leadership positions in the Church as such we are being called to teach and preach the word of God. When Jesus was teaching the things he was saying he made people uncomfortable and I am sure that some of the things that I have said today have made some uncomfortable, but there are times in our lives where we are called to be uncomfortable and it is in this uncomfortable place we are able to grow as Christians and in our relationships with each other. So I challenge each of us in this chapel today to try to live our lives in a way that each of us putting aside the labels that we have put on ourselves, to break down the walls of silos we have put around us and to see people as what they are Children of God! This will not be easy this will take changing a lot of our habits and biases that we have. In the words of the Ho’oponopono mediation and I say to you, the community that I have come to love and learn from in these years in seminary, I am sorry, Please Forgive me, I love you, thank you. May God give us the grace to strive for reconciliation and of Peace.




[1] Ho'oponopono mediation retrieved September 10, 2012 from http://www.thereisaway.org/Ho%27oponopono_cleaning_meditation.htm


[2] Luke 23:41


[3] Holy Women Holy Men, p. 737

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Back from Haiti

Hello everyone!! I came back from Haiti Friday Morning and after a weekend of lots of sleep and unpacking I am back and ready to hit the ground running. This is going to be a pretty long post so please bear with me.

Day 1--Travel to Haiti
I left San Francisco on a Red Eye flight to New York to head to Haiti. I love to fly so spending a long time in an airplane was no big deal. When I arrived at Haiti I was amazed to be guided to a bus that took us to a warehouse kind of thing for customs. I was scheduled to arrive about an hour before Katherine+, Sif and Jane; so I went to the customs area and asked one of the luggage assistants if I could sit at the little desk they had while I waited for my companions. They said yes and the next thing I know I was talking away with people as well as helping to guide people through the process!

Fr. Deravil arrived and we went on the 2 hour drive to Montrious (Moe-wee). The drive was already very eye opening, I was witnessing people still living in tents as well as the large amount of garbage that was around us. I remember vividly the rancid smell of burning garbage. We finally arrived at the rectory and as I looked bast the house I could see the ocean right infront of me!! It was clear blue and you could see the coral right through the water.






Day 2--St. Paul's School
We woke up to breakfast and the sound of the waves crashing against the beach. We drove the short distance to the school and when we arrive we were greeted by the principal and the director of education. We were allowed to go from class to class observing the class rooms. When we arrived in the first class room (kindergarten) they all stood up and sang us a song about welcome friends! I was so moved. We then went the the other class rooms where i was able to read the children a story about snow; something that they more than likely have never seen before. After the story we handed out sheets to the kids asking them to fill out information about themselves so we can take it back to our children back in Minnesota. As we were going through this process I noticed a young boy sitting there and through the interpreter I asked him why he was not doing the activity. He told me that he could not read; so I said no problem and the interpreter and I were able to write the sheet for him as well as having him draw a picture of himself. It was so wonderful.

We then were able to watch the meals that are being prepared for the students. We were able to help serve and get the meals ready and when it was time we watched each of the classrooms come to the cafeteria area and have lunch. After lunch the children had a little bit of play time and while I was standing around a young boy pulled on my hand and invited me to a wonderful game of Breadfruit Ball Soccer. The next thing I knew I was on a basketball court playing with about 15 kids this game. It was so much fun!!


Day 3--We went to the local market to see where the food for the lunch program is purchased. It was no supermarket that we are used to here in the US. Local merchants just set up on the ground or on some of the booths that are established in the area. I was amazed to see that there was everything that one could imagine.

Day 4--It was Sunday and we arrived at St. Pauls (same building for the church and the school) and I saw how everyone was dressed to the nines for Church. Since the service was in French I did not know much of what was going on but I was able to follow along because they used the same Book of Common Prayer that we use here. As I was standing there just absorbing the service around me a man handed me his hymnal for me to use. I was amazed to see how similar it was so Spanish and he let me use it for the entire service. We got to hear a sermon from my Rector Katherine Sedwick and it was translated by the priest. After the service we then were taken to a few hotels in the area. This city was the where Club Med used to be located but even though Club Med was no longer there the hotels still were. As we were driving to the hotels I see beat up houses and people selling what ever they could on the street. Then we turned into a driveway and the world changed. We noticed that the lawns were manicured and there were really nice cars in the parking lot. As we walked up to the hotel we found out that it is over $250 a night to stay there. While we were also there we noticed that there was an aid organization that had booked up two of these hotels for a long period of time. This was very aggravating; I kept asking is this where the donation dollars that people have given have gone?




Day 4--We interviewed two children who eat the lunches that we help provide and then headed to Port Au Prince. During the drive to Port Au Prince to the Episcopal Diocese Center where we got in another car (thankfully air conditioned) to go to the orphanage where we were staying. We arrived at the Orphanage and we were all beat.

Day 5--One of the things that St. Luke's does is it purchases Haitian art and brings it back to Minnesota to sell to raise money for the lunch program. We had a wonderful tour guide Loull (Lul) who drove us around to make the purchase. Our first stop was a local artist co-op where we made many purchases. After that we went to some of the street vendors where I learned that I have a knack for negotiating prices. We also were able to visit a community of Episcopal Sisters. These sisters had their convent destroyed in the earthquake but still were able to continue the ministry of providing care and housing for senior women.


Day 6--We quickly had to find a new place to stay for our last night in Port Au Prince. After an angel came to our rescue we continued our mission to find art. I was able to continue my negotiations with the street vendors to purchase art for the program. Finally we spent the time together as a group in prayer and just spending some time decompressing and packing.

Day 7--Headed back to the US after 7 very fast and confusing security checks I made it to the plane and I came home tired.

This journey was wonderful beyond words, I know that it would be hard to put it all here in this blog post. It was transformative for me; I came home honestly having a very difficult time with the reentry. It was hard to see some of the things I witnessed in Port Au Price. This led me to give a pretty powerful sermon on March 25 at my field ed parish. I will post it as soon as it is posted on the parish website.

Thank you so much for your prayers while I was there and also to those who donated the money to help me get to Haiti.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Off to Haiti

Hi there everyone, it has been a while since I have posted so I thought I would give a quick update. In January when I was back in Minnesota I found out that there was going to be a trip to visit the school we partner with in Haiti and was invited to go. I was able to fundraise the money to be able to go on this trip with the generosity of many people. To them I say thank you so much! I hope that this trip will be a rich and rewarding experience.

I am right now sitting in the airport about to board a red eye flight to New York City then connect to the plane that will take me to Haiti. It will be about a 12-14 hour total travel time to get to the placce where we will be staying but I know that it will be worth it. I am not sure what kind of internet access I will have so I might not be able to update anything until I get back into the United States on March 15. I ask that you please keep my Rector Katherine, Jane Sif and I in your prayers while we are gone.

Thank you so much for your support and love. I will give you a longer more indepth update when I get back.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Faithful Friends

I am sitting here still in Minnesota and starting to get ready to head back to California. For those of you who are on Facebook and friends with me you might remember that I posted a scripture one day it was from the Book of Sirach and is one of my favorite passages it says:

"Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter:
whoever finds one has found a treasure.
Faithful friends are beyond price;
no amount can balance their worth.
Faithful friends are life-saving medicine;
and those who fear the Lord will find them.
Those who fear the Lord direct their friendship aright,
for as they are, so are their neighbors also."--Sirach 6:14-17


During this time home I have been able to see how this scripture passage really is apart of my life. I have been blessed and able to see so many friends while I have been home. I have been having lunches, coffees, breakfasts, and dinners and just chats with friends. It really hit me as I was going through these weeks was that I have been so blessed to have so many friends by my side. These friends have been by my side throughout this process and they continue to support me as I continue for me there is really, "no amount can balance their worth." I want to thank all of those who I was able to see and offer an apology to those that I did not, Ill be back in June!!

I was also able to see my family; I was able to participate in the annual Johnson Family Christmas in Duluth. While I was there I was able to see the family and to see how committed they are to being there for Matthew and I. I was able to share what I have been up to as well as being able to get some much needed family time; I had been running on fumes being away for so long and my heart has been filled.

The other part of my time off was to go back to my home parish and to serve on the altar. While I was there it was so great to feel at home! As with my family I was able to connect with the community that raised me up and who also continues to support me. While I was there it was so wonderful to hear feedback from the community, I would hear, "my you have grown so much!" "Keep up the good work you look fantastic" and "it is so wonderful to have you home" and many others. This is my home parish no matter where this journey takes me, I have been with the community in the good times and the bad and I am so thankful for their support.

I also was able to attend the Seminarians Conference for the Episcopal Church in Minnesota; it was wonderful to see friends and to spend some time in prayer, reflection, and sharing with my fellow seminarians. During this time I also met with the standing committee and I am now a candidate for holy orders.

This time at home, I promised myself that I was going to be kind to myself and to relax. Even though my schedule was filled with meeting various friends this time has been one of rest, relaxation, and reminders of how blessed I am and how much support I have.

I leave back to California on Saturday the 14th and I am leaving is a very peaceful place. Today I had coffee with a friend and one of the first things she said to me was, "wow you look so peaceful." I think that this is where my soul is right now, it is at peace. There is always going to be anxiety in my life but I am at peace with this journey that I am on. I will say that there is some to be said about the way one feels when they are doing what they are called to be doing. In a year and a half I have seen how much growth I have received, and even though growing is something that I will be doing for the rest of my life, I am so thankful for the growth I have received.

Many of you have asked me about my sermons; the parish I am intern at posts 4 weeks of sermons for anyone to hear. For those who would like you can click on this link and hear the sermons right over the web (please note it is audio only).

http://oursaviourmv.org/podcasts/


So as I close I want to thank you all for your love and support through this process; please know that you are in my prayers.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Hi its me...Im alive :-)

Hello everyone, it has been a long time coming this blog post and I am truly sorry for the delay. I am writing this from my home in Minnesota, I am here with the pugs next to me and I am loving being home (except for the cold and NO SNOW!!). Alot has happened since my last post, I have been working as an intern at the Episcopal Church of our Saviour in Mill Valley California and I am loving every second of it. I have been able to be challenged in ways that I never thought of, I have been able to preach at least once a month and I have been able to work with the fantastic children's program. I am not saying that it is all peaches and cream but to be honest I am really loving it! With field education as well as my 5 classes this semester there are some days where I can not catch my breath; but it is through this craziness that I have been able to continue the work on my pastoral identity.

As we are in the novena up to Christmas I went back and started reflecting on what has been happening not only in my life since I entered the official seminary process in general but in my life over all. I love this website called woot.com many of you know but for those who do not it is a type of GroupOn site where they offer a deal a day in different categories. I fell in love with the T-Shirts that they offer and many of them I have, they are funny or just silly and they serve for me a reminder not to take things so seriously. Well one day I looked and the T-Shirt was this image:


As I looked at this image I laughed a little but then I went into my "theology" mind and I looked at it some more. The first two weeks of Advent offer us scripture readings that talk about John the Baptist and his infamous cry from the wilderness to make straight the path of the Lord. I kept thinking to myself mmmm has Woot followed the lectionary in publishing this T-shirt? I was struck about how windy the road it and how it seems that it must take forever to get from one place to the next. I looked at this and realized what a wonderful metaphor for life!! I think at this moment I chuckled because I thought wow it has happened I am thinking way to in depth here.

I looked at this picture and realized that this is how our lives are; no matter how much we try there are going to be twists and turns no matter where we go. So how can we follow John's decree of making straight the path of the Lord and realizing that our lives are on such a twisted road? Well what came to me is that we try! This is our job in life is to try to live our lives and try to make straight the path when we can. No matter how much we try we are not able to make the path straight every step but we are to try.

During these past few months the advent of the Occupy movement had hit it stride and like you I would read the pictures that people had taken telling their stories and talking about how they are apart of the 99%. I was amazed and moved by many of the stories many of them lead me to tears; and these stories really made me take a look at myself and my life. I had been living my life the best way that I could with my husband and our kids (2 dogs 2 cats) and we were comfortable, I was making money and we were living comfortably. Then we decided that I was to take this leap of faith and head off to seminary. I did and the dynamics have changed. We are surviving and continuing to live our live the way we know how. We took this journey together and we do not know where we are going, will I have a job? Who knows? Will a job be open in Minnesota? Who knows? There are many different questions that we are going to encounter but we continue to walk this path each day step by step.

This takes me back to the image above, we all living a world where we are initiated with people telling us that this is the way or that way that we should turn on our journeys. Sometimes we follow the sign and sometimes we do not; the road we are on is our road and it is your road as well. Taking this journey is a scary one and there might be times were we realize after a while that we have made a U-turn and did not realize it. I know that as you are reading this you are asking where is the hope here?

Since I have been able to preach alot more I try to find hope in my sermons and to share that with the communities I am preaching to. So where is the good news in all of this? Well I think that the good news here is that what we are being called to do in our lives is to try and to be the best people that we know how to be. This is not to say that we can just him and hah and say well this is the best I know; absolutely not. But rather we will need to learn and continue to discern in our journeys. Sometimes we follow the signs on the road and learn something good or bad but we are learning. I do not think that John the Baptist was telling us that we need to straighten every road that we encounter but rather to work on those roads that we can; and know that we are doing what we can. No matter the journey I hold on to the hope in my heart that no matter the journey that I will arrive and that this journey will teach me alot and that this journey will help me to live into my happiness while I am on this journey and not just at the end of the journey.

I wish you all a wonderful Christmas and a very Happy New Year I am going to try to post more but to be honest I dont know when I will have the time to.

Thank you again so much for continued love and support of me and Matthew in this process and know that all of you are in my prayers.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

First day of a new semester

Hello there everyone, I want to apologize for the rest I took from writing on my blog this summer. I wanted to take a break and I knew that CPE would be very busy so that is the reason for my delay. I am going to try to be better about writing updates so please bear with me.

I am writing this post after the first day of the semester. I was so excited to have an 8:00 am Systematic Theology class then go work for the chapel as a sacristan, then run to meet with my field ed supervisor, then back to the seminary to lead sung evening prayer and then do the bulletin for our upcoming community night. To say it was packed and busy is an understatement, but to be honest I would not change a moment of it.

This year I have a wonderful list of classes, I have Systematic Theology, Preaching, Field Education (internship in a parish), and Greek. I am continuing down the road of seminary and I am so thankful that God gives me each day to be here to study and pray. I am also one of the sacristans for the seminary; I am able to work on helping to set up liturgies for the seminary (this totally feeds my liturgical nerd needs). I know that to many of you this might not seem like a WHOO HOO type of thing but for me I am not only working for the community but I am able to learn about liturgy and the diversity of liturgies that we have in the Episcopal Church. I am also working as an intern at Church of Our Savior in Mill Valley. I have done my first "official" liturgy withe community and I am so excited and feel very lucky to be working with such an energetic community. I will be preaching, working in the parish as they need me and attending various meetings. This time is a sort of Lab time where I am able to try things in ministry in a safe setting, I know from this soon in my time there that I am going to learn a lot!!

I also wanted to give you an update about my CPE experience I had this summer. It was absolutely wonderful! I was able to spend a majority of my time working at a Children's Hospital in St. Paul as well as an "adult" hospital. I was stretched in so many ways. I was able to do the work and find some of my pastoral identity as well as to overcome some of my fears working in a hospital setting. I was challenged also to keep working on myself. I thought that by now I was able to have this all done and over with but I realized that one is never done working on themselves. I was able to be with people during times of great anxiety and it was such a blessing to have people open up the invitation to be with them. There were many tear and frustration but it was totally trumped by laughter and joy. I was also blessed to do my first funeral. It was for a young man and I was given the grace by God to do the service and it was wonderful, for the first time I felt like a priest.

Well sorry for the long post and I honestly need to get some sleep. Thank you so much for all your love and prayers; please know that I am praying you all.

Peace,

Jason B. Lucas

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Where is God......

I am sorry again that it has been such a long time since I posted. I am writing this now as a person who has finished my first year of seminary. It is so hard to imagine how fast this went by!! It was a time of great transition both good and bad. I struggled in many arenas but I also excelled in many other arenas as well.

I am leaving tomorrow afternoon back to Minnesota to continue my journey. I have a few days off, heading up to Duluth for a few days before I get back to start my Clinical Pastoral Education in St. Paul. I am so excited but a little nervous for this chaplaincy but I am ready and willing to head out.

I titled this post where is God because lately that is how I am thinking about things in my life. I have had experiences and I start to ask myself where is God in this? Many times I am surprised that I had blocked God out of the situation and it became all about me (insert chuckle). I have learned that this is not all about me and that there are times where I have to let God be God, no matter how difficult it can be. As I started down the last few days of the semester I found that I was extremely overwhelmed and I was getting irritable and anxious. I sat down and asked myself where is God? I realized that I had not been praying like I should be and that I was not giving my anxiety over to God. I decided to sit and do Evening Prayer in my room and give my stress and my anxiety over to God. Now this is not to assume that God was coming down and writing my papers but rather I asked for help. I asked God to walk with me and be with me and to help me deal with this yucky feeling.

I am also a little sad to see the graduates leave. I have been so fortunate to build wonderful relationships this year and I know when I get back a large group of people I have come to know and love will not be here. I find great joy however in knowing that these people will be my peers throughout my career and I can turn to them in times of need or support. This is a really interesting part of seminary that we build such intense relationships and then we seem to disappear. We do not disappear but rather we leave here ready to hit the ground running in our various ministries. Again I ask, Where is God? I see God in this arena as giving us a great network of friends and peers that will be able to support us no matter where we are in the country. This group of people will be there and able to help me see things in my ministries in very different contexts.

So to all of you who have prayed and loved me through this year I give you my heartfelt thanks. I would not be able to accomplish this without the love and support of my partner Matthew, my children (Princess Patty, Princess Lucy, Nadia, and Julia) my family in Minnesota and Arizona and without the love and support of my friends and prayer partners. Please know that I keep you in my prayers!

I hope to keep blogging through the summer.

I love you all and thank you!

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Friday, April 1, 2011

You cant go home again....or can you????

I am back from my travels throughout the country and I have finished my first week of class after spring break. I left on March 15 to the Seminarians of Color conference in Alexandria, VA. I was able to connect with other seminarians of color as well as for me to get a better perspective of who I am and how I fit in my own skin. Many of you know I am Hispanic but I don't look like it by any means. Having an Anglo father and a Mexican Mother, plus adding the fact that I lived in Minnesota I look really white. However, deep down inside I am Mexican, it is my roots, the way I was raised and who I am.

After the conference I left Virgina and went off to Arizona to spend some wonderful time with my family there. I was able to spend time with my nephews and sister but also to spend time with my aunts and grandparents. The time that I spent there was just wonderful, when I walked into my grandmothers house she pointed at the vent in the floor and said, "do you remember what this was for?" My aunts and my cousins turned and said, it was the telephone. When we were kids we would scatter around the house and use the air conditioning vents to play telephone. As I was in her house a flood of memories came to me. Where I sat on Christmas while we opened gifts, the stockings that were on the wall, and my favorite Noel candle holder on the bar in the house. I went back to being 8 years old again. It was wonderful! I also went to visit my mom and while I was there I saw a picture on the wall of my great grand father and I. I must have been 5 or 6. When he would come over to our house I would sit on his lap and put his baseball hat on. I still remember how they smell. This was a picture of me in his hat and him holding me. I still get a little teary when I think of that picture.

While I was back in Arizona it really hit me that it does not matter how white I look on the outside because who I am is both external and internal. I am a Hispanic man and this trip helped me to get solidified in my roots.

I then got to spend some wonderful time in Las Vegas with Matthew. He was so wonderful to me by driving from Minnesota to Las Vegas so I can have a car while I am at seminary. I quickly realized that I am needed to have a car while I am here in seminary and he was so wonderful to bring it to me.

As I write this I am so amazed that my first year of seminary is almost over. I will return to Minnesota for 3 months to do my Clinical Pastoral Education at United Hospital in St. Paul and then I will come back to California for my second year of seminary. It is amazing how fast it is going.

We are now smack dab in the middle of Lent. Each day of Lent I am reminded of what I am being called to be and to serve God's people. There are days where it gets lonely and I get blue but then I think of many people who are supporting me in this process. Without the Grace of God and the support of all of you I do not think that I would have been able to make it through this first year.

Today I read an article about the pastor in Florida who had threatened to burn the Qur'an on September 11 held a mock trial against the Qur'an and the punishment for the Qur'an was to burn it. He soaked the Qur'an in flammable liquid for an hour and then burned it. As I read this I could feel the pity for this man in my heart but also I felt shame that this person was a Christian just as I am a Christan and he is doing these terrible things. How can a person be Christian and speak hate? We live in a very diverse world and even though we might not agree with everyone around us we need to listen to the words of Mother Teresa and to "See Christ in everyone." How??? now that is the question of the ages. This evening at evening prayer I prayed for this pastor and for the people who were involved with this trial. There are times in our lives were we need to pray for people that we do not agree with at all. Jesus asks us to pray for our enemies and this is much harder than we think. As I was praying for this pastor and his congregation I could feel the anger in me grow and grow. However, as I prayed for him out loud I could feel the anger drop and I was filled with pity for this person. I ask for you to also pray for these people as well as to pray that there may be reconciliation from this divisive actions.

Well this has been a much longer post that I thought it was going to be. Please feel free to email me with any prayer requests that you have.

Please continue to pray for Matthew and I as we continue down this journey and know that you are in my prayers.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Lent

I write to you on the eve of Lent, good old Ash Wednesday. I received a couple of emails after my last post so I think I should clarify whats going on.

I think that there are times in our lives where God calls us into a quite reflection. This is not a good or bad thing but rather a time period to sit back and take stock, sort of speak, of where I am in my life now and where I think I am going. I have honestly been hit the past couple of weeks by an emotional tidal-wave and I needed to unpack it and see how I can work with it. Well last Friday I got to officiate one of our "Black Friday" Evening Prayers and it was in that moment that I felt the Spirit coming upon me and re-energizing me. When we came to the personal intercessions, I said, "In thanksgiving for a renewed Spirit." I feel like I am on top of the world again. I am still not the bubbly person that I usually am but I have a clearer picture of what is going on in my life. I know that I am in the right place at the right time of my life. When I started the discernment process I was instructed to read a book called Listening Hearts in this book it talks about some of the signs of knowing if you are on the right path is that things seems to fall into place. I now have a writing coach to help me with my writing, I heard from Matthew about the wonderful people who have helped him recover from surgery, Lucy is feeling better after her surgery (well enough to destroy another one of my pillows) and I am being able to head to see my sister and my family in Arizona as well as taking a much needed vacation for Matthew and I in Las Vegas.

I have also been blessed to have many people step up in my life here in California to support me in ways that I could not imagine. Many times it is just someone saying Jason lets go for lunch you need to get out of here or someone realizing I have been spending way too much time on my Martin Luther paper and posting the 95 Theses on my door (Thanks AE You know who you are :-)) I feel that God sends people into our lives when we need them the most.

I have also been pondering about the future and what is laying in front of me. This summer I will be in a CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) program at United Hospital, next fall I will be getting my hands dirty and working in a parish here in California. I also get to start taking more electives in my course work to help me to get a broader experience of seminary.

The main thing that I feel I have learned from these last few weeks is that this is me growing more and more into who I am. This is not to say that I wont get down or upset ever again but rather each time this happen I am able to discern what is going on and see how to respond to it, if I need to.

As for Ash Wednesday, since I was small I used to love Ash Wednesday. I used to love to walk around with ashes on my head. It was this sign that helped me to remember that I was Christian and with this big black cross on my forehead there was no way of denying that. The other reason I loved this time of year was what the priest would say when they put the ashes on my head. Depending on the priest you got you would hear, "Turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel." or "Remember you are dust and to dust you shall return." The first saying for me is what we are charged with for our whole life not just Lent. We should turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel. This is not to say that we will never sin but rather when we do we can turn and continue to live the Gospel. The Gospel calls us to live in Charity, Peace and Love. These are very simple messages that we can live our lives by. I think that many times people get so caught up in the who is right and who is wrong that often the messages of Charity, Peace and Love are forgotten.

So as I start my journey into Lent, I offer this as my Lenten discipline, I am going to keep a positive focus for the next 40 days. I can sit and keep worrying about things that I dont have answers to right now such as, how am I going to pay for this after I am done, will I have a job after seminary, or where will Matthew and I end up living after this is all over and live in these ambiguous questions or I can choose to see the positive in the experiences that I am having here. I am going to try to live the Gospel in my life and my challenge to you is to try and do the same, this Lent and after.

I ask you to please keep me in your prayers and know that I will be keeping you in mine.

I saw the cartoon below and realized that part of our Christian life is that we should laugh. So in good fashion I offer you the Ash Wednesday Carton below.

I wish you all a very Happy Lent Season! Happy Ash Wednesday.

Peace,


Jason Lucas

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Why God? Why This?

Have you ever wondered why things happen in your life when they do? As I have started this semester and now a few weeks into it, I sometimes ask the question of why do certain things happen to others and to me in this part of our lives? Well from what I have learned and prayed about the answer is a clear, "I have no idea." I think I have a few assumptions but not sure.

Here they go:
1) It will hep you grow. True it will help me to grow as a person and to be a better human being, or a better student, a better husband or whatever it will help me grow.

2) It just is what it is. As much as I do not like this assumption I have to say that this is where I tend to see a much better answer for me. There are sometimes in our lives where things happen just because they happened. This does not mean I am being punish or cursed but it just needed to happen.

3) To test me. This is the one that I really do not put much weight into. I don't feel like Lot where I am being tested to prove my love for God. Rather the opposite is true.

Now you are probably reading this asking, "Jason what the heck is going on in your mind right now?" Well to fill you in I have started my second semester of seminary and in some ways the polish has started to dull. The second semester you do not get to pick an elected and the "newness" of seminary starts to diminish. This is not to say that I am not happy but rather it is a different feeling. I will also admit that the loneliness is starting to really hit home this semester. Being way from Matthew and the animals really has been hard.

These past few weeks I have been asking myself, "what do I want to get out of Seminary?" Going to seminary I thought I was going to come out a priest and that is it. I will have to say that it is my job in seminary to be a better Christian who feels that God is calling me to be a priest. In seminary there are many challenges that one faces, budgeting time, homework, reading, chapel obligations, field ed, community life, and in my case writing. Each of these challenges brings me into a better place in my life. The challenge of budgeting my time is a valuable skill that I will need for the rest of my life. Homework and reading keep telling me that I never can stop learning, rather I must strive to learn more and more each day. Chapel obligations, for me this is where I have most fun. To come into worship to spend time in prayer with God and my peers is an experience that I love more and more each day. This for me feeds my soul to give me the drive to stay another day in the service of God and the Church. As some of you know I open the chapel 4 days of out 5 here at the seminary and I usually get about 15-20 min alone in the chapel before people show up for morning prayer. It is in this time that I have my talks with God. We talk about things that are on my mind, the happy, sad, good and ugly. As much as I would love to sleep in each day, being able to open the chapel and have that time with God is so valuable to me. Community life is something that we get here in the seminary in droves. As with any community we are a family, that means we are a FAMILY, we celebrate our lives together, be there for each other and sometimes argue with each other. This does not mean we do not love each other but rather we want to learn from each other, even though sometimes we completely disagree.

This past couple of weeks have been really interesting for me, I have been in a more quiet space in my life. I tend to be quite in many aspects of my life with many of you know is very difficult for me to do. I think that right now I am needing to sort many things out and that this quiet time will help me to get a better grasp on what I need to be doing.

Finally, I wanted to tell you about a wonderful gift that I got today. One of my fellow students was talking to me and I was telling her how much I had been missing home, Matthew and the dogs, and today I got in the mail a wonderful package with a Port-A-Pug kit (Picture Below). It was so wonderful that I started to tear up. This act made me feel loved and listened to. I am so appreciative for her, this gift helped me to brighten up my day.

I am so thankful for the ability to be here and even though the challenges God continues to bless me and I hope that he will bless you as well.

You are all in my prayers.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Some days

Hi everyone, sorry about the delay in posting something. I have been back in action and classes are going ok. Lots to read but that is part of the program.

I wish I could say I was doing better today. Matthew had surgery on Friday and has been recovering at home in a lot of pain. He just called me this afternoon to tell me that Princess Lucy needed surgery (she had a nail get torn out and they had to knock her out to fix it) and now he and the one of the dogs are recovering. I am feeling extremely guilty that I am not there to help out with what is going on. I know that God has called me to be at seminary but that does not make things like this any easier. I keep telling myself, if I was home I could be fixing this and taking care of Matthew and Lucy.

But there is a lesson here, the lesson is that there are many people who are caring for us to go through this process. We have such wonderful friends who live downstairs from us that have been taking wonderful care of Matthew and now Lucy and I am eternally thankful for the love and support that they have given.

I also realize that this is a community that is in this journey with us no just Matthew and I. We have had support through Matthews surgery and recovery and we will continue.

With all that said it does not make things any easier for me. It is something I have to pray with and deal with but sometimes it just seems to hit me harder than others.

I thank you for your prayers, love and support.

Peace,
Jason

Monday, January 31, 2011

Second Semester

Hello everyone, I am back from a very wonderful but cold break and I am ready to start the semester. I am entering this semester with a new tool to help me with my writing and that is a writing coach. I am so excited to be working with her and to be able to get my writing in gear.

The break was a wonderful time to spend with Matthew and the animals. I had a great time seeing friends and also realizing that when I am bored I will bake. I had the opportunity to preach at my home parish and this helped me to figure out who I was as I have taken on this new role of seminarian.

I have been back in California for a week now and I am so happy to be in warmer weather but I am also ready to just get going. I am excited to see what this new semester will bring as well as what new learning is on the horizon.

I ask that you please keep John Bauer in your payers.

Know that you are always in my prayers!

Peace,
Jason Lucas

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

End of the Semester

I am sitting here writing and there are only 7 more school days in the semester.  I seems that this semester has just flown on by.  I have had a challenging few months here at seminary I had to get used to not having Matthew around, I then had to learn to be a student again including writing, to get a routine of being a seminarian and to get used to the warm weather (OK this is more of a joy than a struggle).  But I have made it, after this semester I feel that I will have much more self confidence because I have a history if I can do it once I can do it again!

This week I get to preach for the first time here at CDSP, I am talking about how important Mary is in my life and how she has taught me many lessons that I need and will need in the future.  In my sermon I am talking about my struggle with writing.  Mary was a symbol of humility and I had to experience that when I came to CDSP.  When I was working in the world, I was good at what I did, I knew things off the top of my head and I felt smart.  However, these past few weeks I have learned that I really do not know it all and that there are things that I continue to need to work on and even ask for help.  As many of you know I like to just do things myself and not always rely on help from others.  However, since coming to seminary I am realizing that I am not in this alone and that I can not do this alone.  I went and asked for help and they are getting me a tutor to help me with my writing. 

When I was home for reading week I had dinner with a great friend of mine, and she told me, "Jason you just need to ask for what you need!"  As hard as it is for me to do this it is true, no one can live on an island, it is vital to have a support network to walk with you in your journey.  I am so thankful that I have so many people here to support me through this journey.

Next Friday I fly back to Minnesota until January 23.  This is a long time that I hope will allow me to spend quality time with Matthew as well as to be able to see as many of you as I can and to spend some good snuzzle time with the animals. 

I ask for your continued prayers and support as I go down this road and please know that you will be in my prayers as well.

Peace,

Jason Lucas

Monday, November 29, 2010

November


It has been an interesting November, I can’t believe how fast it has flown!!  It has been an interesting time that papers are due, studying gets ramped up and our obligations all come to a peak.  I have been able to work more on my writing.  I find myself pulling my hair out because I don’t know how much more I can do to improve.  I will not quit I am not going to let this get in my way.  This is easier to say than to do but I know that this is what I should be doing and that this is one hurdle I am going to have to clear.  No one said that seminary was going to be easy, but that is why I am here to get challenged and to learn those things that I do not know.

I have also been able to write a liturgy for the community.  I wrote a bi-lingual liturgy where we will be crowing the Virgin Mary.  It was so wonderful to be writing in Spanish.  I will even get to preach on December 9!

I was able to go to Arizona to be with my sister and my nephews over the Holidays, it was so wonderful to spend time with them.  My nephews are growing up so fast I can’t believe it.  Every time I see them they have doubled in height.  While I was there I was able to take a few days off from reading and to just be it felt to so wonderful!

I know that my last few post have shown how I am struggling at times while I am here at seminary and I thank all of your for your love and support.  It is true that this is tough and there are days where I seem to just be treading water but I know that even though it is small I am making progress.  I am looking forward to coming home to MN for a few weeks and to start my next semester.

I thank you all for your love and support of me and Matthew as we go through this.  I ask for your continued love, support and prayers.  Please know that you will be in mine as we..

Peace,

Jason Lucas